When you have a baby, the whole world and his friend want to come and visit you. Those first few weeks are non stop hustle and bustle, people in and out. As time goes by family member's cannot wait to steal your new baby away for the day...Or the night. The invite is only extended to your child. You, the parent are not invited. They want alone time with your baby, without you!
When Leo was 8 weeks old his Grandad and Grandma visited us at home. I was then told by his Grandma that they were going to be taking him out for the day the following weekend. The abruptness completely caught me off guard and I felt obliged to accept. By obliged, I mean forced up against the wall in a cut throat kind of situation. I was not expecting to be told they were taking my son out, I was not asked. It was an expected right.
I have never been very good at dealing with outspoken comments like this, and this time it cut deep. They thought they were doing me a favour, giving me a break, but it didn't feel like that. I felt like I had no choice but to let them take him. Like if I objected I would seem to be an over-protective parent.
The last thing I wanted was to be separated from my baby boy for a whole day, especially at 8 weeks old. What if they didn't feed him properly? What if he get's fussy on the bottle and they don't purserver? What if they take the bottle away and he is hungry? What if he wont stop crying? What if there is a car crash? What if he just want's his Mummy?
My worries fell on deaf ears and it soon became apparent that Leo was going out without me, and I wasn't allowed to go with him. Luke didn't understand my reservations and has a very relaxed approach to family members taking Leo for the day. I on the other hand just don't like being seperated from him, and at 8 weeks old am I wrong to have felt that way?
He did go out for the day from 11 through till gone 6pm, he was late coming home. I just wanted him back with me so I could get him bathed and ready for bed.
It seems that the world did not end with him leaving me for the day, but why should I have to give people this time with MY baby at 8 weeks old? Or 40 weeks old for that matter?
I write this post now, as the subject has yet again cropt up. His Grandad and Grandma wish to take him out for the day in the next couple of weeks, and I don't want him to go. The same forceful appraoch from his Grandma was applied 'We haven't taken him out in ages, we WILL take him out again'.
Oh will you now? Why don't you ask his Mother first and see how she feels before you automatically assume you have a God given right to take him.
I thought it would get easier as he got older, and I would get more relaxed. It seems I haven't and now I have a whole new set of worries running through my mind. What if he doesn't settle for them? What if he is upset the whole time? What if he doesn't get his two naps? What if he had an accident in their care? My worries go on and on....
What I am asking you is, what would you do in my position? Would you have let your 8 week old baby go off into the world without you? How would you handle the force applied in order to get you to agree?
Laura
xx
