First Trimester - 5 Weeks Pregnancy Update

At 5 weeks the baby is the size of a Orange Seed!

There is still so much uncertainty over just how far gone I am. 

Hopefully this is a mystery that can be wrapped up this coming Thursday, that is when I visit my local hospital for a scan to pinpoint just how many weeks pregnant I am.

How am I feeling?

Last week we went for my re-scan at Peek-a-baby, and I left feeling horrible. 

They could see the sack but no baby, words like ‘early pregnancy failure’ were thrown around and I felt my body start to shut down. I didn’t want to talk to the sonographer any longer, she wasn’t a lady of many words (English wasn’t her first language which didn’t help), and I felt that  she hadn’t communicated anything very well to me at all. 

The tears started to fall in the car when we left, we were now on a journey to tell Luke’s mum the news of our pregnancy and expanding family. A conversation I didn’t feel like having anymore, because there was doubt in my mind, I may not be having a baby at all anymore. 

I didn’t even know if I was going to be able to stop the tears before we arrived, and I didn’t know if they would stop and stay shut off during any conversations we were about to have. I was supposed to be excited, I was supposed to be happy about telling family about our news, but I actually felt like a fraud telling people about a baby that may actually never be.

On that car journey I googled early scans, I googled pregnancy sacks that didn’t house embryos and came across ‘blighted ovum’, this is a term that refers to a pregnancy that will never ever be.

A blighted ovum is when a pregnancy establishes, a sack develops, a positive pregnancy test is witnessed and the placenta even starts to develop... but the baby never does. 

It’s an early form of miscarriage.

Whatever way I choose to look at this pregnancy, we weren’t going to know anything for another 2 weeks, and that fortnight has felt like an eternity.

Telling Luke's Family

We arrived at Luke’s Mum’s house, and Luke made the announcement. Everyone was very happy, but I didn’t share that excitement. Instead I felt anxious, worried and lost.

That next day I was an emotional mess, Luke very almost booked an early scan somewhere else to try and put my mind at rest, but I told him we needed to wait. I kept going over my dates again and again, Luke was certain that I was just way to early to see anything much on a scan.

Boy how I wanted to believe him.

Going Back Over My Dates...

I went over the dates all day, plotting possible eventualities on my calendar. I ovulated on May 21st, got my first faint positive on June 3rd. Got a 1-2 weeks pregnant on a Clear Blue Digital on June 4th and added 2 weeks to that date to bring me out at 4 weeks pregnant. When I had attended my first Peek a Baby Scan on June 21st, I believed I was already 6 weeks pregnant, which would make me 8 weeks now. 

Actually though when I looked closely at the dates, allowing up to 12 days for implantation, it was entirely possible that at this stage... I could theoretically only be 5 weeks pregnant. 

That would explain the empty sac at the first scan - I would have only been 3 weeks pregnant. It would explain the empty sac at the re-scan - I would have only been 5 weeks pregnant.

It would have been WAY too early to see anything else really at this stage, however the sonographer could have told me what the measurements were and where that would date me instead of jumping straight to miscarriage.

My symptoms come and go, but my boobs have been sore pretty consistently. After some reflective time I have decided not to get myself worked up about an early scan, I have gone over the different scenarios... blighted ovum, early miscarriage and the third scenario.... my dates are slightly out! 

I think my dates are out, I know when I ovulated but I don’t know when I actually conceived. Now I’ve pulled myself down off the ceiling and had time to mull it all over (and do another dozen pregnancy tests....) I’ve come to the conclusion that it will be good news when I go to my nhs scan next week. 

My Body has given me no reason to distrust it, no bleeding, no cramps. If I hadn't gone for the 'Reassurance' Scan, I would probably still just be in disbelief that I was pregnant.

My advice to anyone considering an early scan is don't do it. My experience had me feeling worse than when I first entered.

Here’s a little overview of 5 weeks pregnant..

I’ve been loving sleep this week, early nights and extra long in bed wherever possible! It ordinarily takes me an age to get off to sleep, but these days I shut my eyes and I’m in the land of nod. 

Symptoms:

Achey boobs, fatigue slightly queasy (every now and then) still peeing multiple times, baby brain is in full swing (I think this is just who I am these days!) My boobs have gone really veiny now!

Bump:

No bump to report yet!

Exercise:

HAHA! Exercise? What is this exercise you speak of!? Nope none of that has been completed this week.... 

First Trimester. Reassurance Scan at Peek-a-Baby Birmingham

Friday 21st June 2019

It feels like I’ve been pregnant for ages already, finding out so early is both a blessing and a curse. Having peed on so many sticks, taken out a mortgage on digital tests... and now booking a early scan on June 21st!

I never was a patient person...

Having a little Google I found a place called Peek-A-Baby in Birmingham, they scan you from 6 weeks of pregnancy. This is when you can see the first glimpses of the little person growing inside of you. 

If my dates were correct I would be 6 weeks + 3 days pregnant at this point. (As I have mentioned in my previous posts though, I had added the 2 weeks to my dates which actually made them in-correct).

We arrived at the practice and found that there was a few parking spaces at the front of the building, and more down the side road. 

We parked up and ventured inside, at this stage of pregnancy you need a rather full (and uncomfortable bladder) for them to be able to spot baby on the scan.

I had been drinking water for the hours car journey, so by the time we arrived I had a sufficiently full bladder. 

It’s not a massive practice, reception is to your left as you walk in. There are some chairs dotted around acting as a waiting area, and they have been keeping a tally on the wall of how many boys, and how many girls have been shown on the gender scans, a milestone that is still many weeks ahead for me!

The appointment was at 5pm, and I was called straight in, Luke, Leo and I. We were all really impressed with the set up in the room. There were a number of chairs for the visitors to sit upon, a bed for me to lie on, and a rather large screen on the wall in front of us so that we would all get a brilliant view!

I lay down and they put the scanning gel on my stomach, while I held down the paper tucked into my dress so that it wouldn’t get on it. 

The sonographer placed the scanner on my abdomen, and pushed down firmly. My insides flickered onto the big screen and I didn’t have a clue what I was looking at. 

At this point it would have been very welcome for the sonographer to explain what we were seeing on the screen, but unfortunately this is where I felt slightly disheartened.

She found Pop’s pregnancy sac, she confirmed that Pop was growing exactly where he should be, not in one of my fallopian tubes. She said at this point it was too early to scan, and although we could see the pregnancy sack, we could not see Pop as it was just too early in the pregnancy. 

We were in there less than 5 minutes, I was told they would re-scan me complimentary in 2 weeks time on the 5th July. 

I have to admit that I did feel that there was a real lack of communication, it was fair enough that I was too early to be scanned, but it would have been nice to know what had been observed on the screen. What did the sac measure in at? Was there a yolk? 

I wasn't worried that they couldn’t see Pop at this stage, I knew my dates could be slightly out, I know when I ovulated but I don’t know exactly when I would have conceived, and I think I could be a few days/weeks out. Based on this information I have currently amended my due date from the 10th February to the 14th February! (Turns out I didn't amend it far enough *insert giggle here*). 

I left happy with the knowledge that there is an actual baby growing inside of me, in my uterus and not a tube. 

I left knowing I was really pregnant!

July 5th 2019 - The Re-scan

We went back on July 5th for another 5pm appointment. The lady on reception warmly greeted us again and we took a seat in the waiting area. 

Within a few minutes we were invited into the room where the scan would be performed. It was the same sonographer and assistant form a fortnight ago.

They prepared my tummy for the ultrasound with the same cold gel and pressed down firmly onto my stomach. My tummy flashed up on the screen and she started looking for Pop.

Once again no real communication was given, and I lay there feeling evermore awkward. She found the pregnancy sack, but not once did she offer explanations on what she was seeing. 

She did confirm that there was a sack and that I was pregnant, it turns out she didn't remember us from 2 weeks ago, she didn't know that we were here for a re-scan. Realisation soon hit her that this was a re-scan and attempted to find my last images.

It took a while and she started going off about using the same name on the form... I was unsure what she meant as I had used the same name each time I had booked in, and by this point I was getting annoyed. I was more worried about the outcome of my pregnancy than some name on a form.

She had a look at the previous images and measured the sac again, and advised that it had grown since the last scan, but she should see a baby now...

Of course my heart was already beating so fast, I could feel myself starting to shut down. I didn’t feel like I was being given a great deal of information and I definitely wasn’t feeling Reassured.

This feeling intensified when she said that it could be Early Pregnancy failure.

Not once during that appointment did she say that my dates could be wrong and I may just not be as far along as I first thought. Not once did she say, your pregnancy sac is measuring *insert appropriate measurements here* and this actually means you are *insert number of weeks pregnant*.

They said they would see me again in 2 weeks, but by then I was not talking much and I was doing my best to get out of the building without crying.

I was convinced the worst was happening.

My NHS scan is on the 18th July and they have booked me back into Peek-A-Baby on 1st August.

Luke thinks that my dates are a few weeks out, which would put me between 5-6 weeks pregnant right now.

After spending the weekend feeling very emotional, I’m hoping that when I go to the NHS appointment I will see a little 7 week embryo with a heartbeat, it could be that because I caught the pregnancy super early (thanks random monthly cycles), that I went for the initial scan, and the second scan way to early.

If that is the case it still doesn’t explain the sonographers rushed scanning approach and lack of bedside manner.  

What has really frustrated me on top of everything else, is that I was sent away with out any of the details surrounding my scan. None of the measurements taken were given to me, and I left empty handed. 

Empty handed, scared and so far from re-assured.