14 Weeks Pregnant

The day I turned 14 weeks pregnant I had the most real, most awful dream. 

It was so vivid that it felt like it was really happening. I was standing with Luke, I don’t know where we were, but he was on the phone. I was 14 weeks pregnant and I felt the baby moving and wiggling really low down. 

So low down that it felt like the baby was falling out.

The next thing I know the baby has wiggled out and is lay in my hands. Our baby was a little girl and was still very much alive, her face was moving and her little mouth was opening and closing, her eyes closed tight. I held her as she took her last little gasps before she left this world.

Then dream Laura became hysterical. 

I felt like this dream lasted forever, and I can still see the little details and features on her tiny little face as she lay in my hand.

I can’t get the image out of my head.

I’m writing this just after waking up, and I’m just so glad that it was all a big horrible dream.

Of course the first thing I did, after calming down of course and convincing myself that it hadn't really happened... Was have a play with the doppler. I know this isn't meant to be for reassurance, I know that people advise against it, but now I am pretty confident in finding baby's heartbeat (eventually) and have a round about idea where baby will be, I just can't help it.

Hearing the beat of Nugget's heart is just incredible and I don't think that it will ever get old. 

Thankfully since this not so pleasant dream on Saturday night, I haven't had anymore like this. Aren't pregnancy dreams just something else? Following this dream though, I can't help thinking that we have a baby girl growing away in there!

We won't officially know until Saturday 29th Feb, but before that we have a lot going on what with our looming trip to New York, London and then Venice for good measure!

At 14 weeks my boobs still hurt, and I am getting some shooting pains through them from time to time, I have been continuing to nap more, and often find myself in front of Netflix having missed almsot entire episodes just to how easy sleep appartently descends on me these days!

I am at that awkward in between stage with clothes and have been living in my gym leggings. I did try my pre-pregnancy jeans on the other week and although they did up, they were far from comfortable!

I have been sent some really lovely Maternity Leggings from Love Leggings, I ordered a pair of Grey Marl in size 8 which is my usual size, they fit beautifully on my legs and bum but I still have lots of room in the bump to fill right now. I wore them for the first time yesterday and they were so comfortable, it was like wearing PJ bottoms.

I love how stretchy the fabric is and how they stretch up over your bump to offer support like a warm hug. I will be packing these for my trip to New York and expect that I will be wearing them for all the travelling as they are going to be the most comfortable option for me.

I'll update how I get on with the leggings as my bump continues to grow (and of course share plenty of bump photos, because it's not everyday you have a bump!) - I also have a pair of their new Maternity Tights to try, I believe these aren't for sale just yet, so I will keep you posted with this too!

I was pondering what I will be packing to take with me this coming Sunday, and everything I am considering boasts the 'comfortable' factor. I will be leaving my pretty dresses at home and thinking sensibly for once!

Tuesday 11th February would have been my due date with the baby I lost back in July. I felt ok in regards to this, but had a day of complete anxiety in regards to my current pregnancy. I convinced myself that I was going to suffer an incompetent cervix and that the dream I had earlier in the week might actually just come true...

I manged to gain some clarity and calm myself down. That night as I was sorting washing I looked over at Luke and chuckled. He asked me what was funny, and I suddenly saw the funny side of how dramatic I was being. I laughed relentlessly, well.. until I cried. 

I laughed and cried at the same time.

I think it is some weird and wonderful pregnancy trick.


On the back of this I have booked myself in for a private scan tomorrow. I just want to know that everything is ok still, calm my anxiety and see if she can check that everything is closed 'down there'.

I recieved a call from the midwife at Worcester Hospital today too, they had finally got my results and progress from Birmingham Women's hospital (apparently it took some chasing) - I wasn't aware that this would now be followed up with Worcester, so that's positive. They advised that I would be under the care of a consultant/midwife, so I don't know how that extra care is going to look at this point.

They did advise that from 28 weeks I will be recieving 3 additional scans just to keep an eye on baby and their growth. This news made my heart fly, I was worried that following the 20 week scan, that would be it. I knew my anxiety would go through the roof. I am beyond happy that they will keep a closer eye on us.

The final baby related appointmnet before we jetted off on our half term travels, was the second reassurance scan that I had booked in with Babyface4d. This is the same place we went for our early scan at 8 weeks.

Of course baby was absolutely fine, nice strong heartbeat and I was told that as baby was so big now they don't measure the crown to rump length anymore. Instead they measure each limb and entity on it's own merit. I was told that everything was fine and these measurements don't really matter until the 20 week anomoly scan.

At 14 weeks baby had slightly shorter femurs than the line percentile, and she said that today she would have given me a slightly different due date to that on my notes.

I was hoping we might get a scan with a good display of the nub, but as you can see baby was feeling very awkward on this day. Their legs were firmly crossed, and we couldn't see a thing. In fact Nugget was feeling that awkward that he or she was actually floating around upside down, the sonogropher had to rotate this image for us!

I left feeling happy, there was no sign of any fluid on the babies neck. I am not going to work myself up over measurements. All I wanted and needed to know right now was that Nugget was still alive and well.

So now our travel adventure begins....