Thursday, 20 February 2014

All the small things

Sometimes you have to cast your eye over all of the good that you have in your life. I know that I am one lucky lady. I have lot's to be positive about, I always have. I have always had a family I can call upon if I need help for any one reason or another. I have loyal friends who I have journeyed on life adventures with, and I have the most amazing little man, Leo, my little boy who is always right by my side. He is growing and changing right before my eyes, and he takes my breath away in the same instance that he turns any frown that may creep upon my face firmly upside down. He makes me laugh and each milestone that he achieves makes me grow prouder by the day. You know that feeling when you become so proud you could quite simply just cry? Leo makes me feel exactly like that. I don't want to cry because I am sad. Sometimes it is quite the opposite, it's because he fills me with such joy and I know that he truly is one in a million.

When Leo says a new word or puts a sentence together for the first time, I beam. It makes me so incredibly happy, I can see him putting the pieces together and joining up his thoughts with what he wants to say, closing that bridge of frustration that sometimes surfaces. 

I watch him soaking in the world around him, every conversation he hears or image that he see's is being absorbed by his being all of the time. A blank canvas being painted with all colours of the rainbow as he explores the world around him and see's everything through his crystal blue eyes. His child's eyes that see nothing but the magic, he knows only the good and most innocent of things about this world that we live in and I wouldn't have it any other way. Right now he see's wonder all around him and simply spying a Squirrel out of the window are the things dreams are made of. We sat and watched Mr Squirrel this morning and he couldn't take his eyes away. The wonder upon his face at the sight of this Squirrel burying his nut outside in the garden, taking it all in but not really understanding what exactly this mystery animal was doing, or why he was doing it. 

We play together until Leo is laughing so hard he actually has the hiccups. He laughs and tells me to 'let go' and in the next breath he is asking for 'more', until he is laughing so hard that those hiccups keep on coming.

I watch him play on his own with all of his favorite toys, which at present seem to be his Lightning McQueen, Tow Mater and a tractor. He will replay scenes from the Car's films that he so loves. The poor un-suspecting tractor will be fast asleep as Lightning McQueen and Tow Mater creep up out of the darkness. With one big bang the poor tractor wakes with a startle and falls backwards towards to the ground. If you have seen the film Leo's demonstration may look familiar...

 Then bath time will roll around and he will insist on filling up his Buzz Lightyear water gun, and when someone mysteriously squirts the wall in the hallway... From the bath I might add. He waits for the question to be posed to him 'Who squirted my walls!?' and with the question out there, Leo giggles. He looks at me and then at the wall and shouts 'Me!' or even 'I did it!'. My cheeky little guy strikes again. 

Leo knows that he is loved, he is told all of the time. He tells me he loves me more. He is even trying to say 'Love you to the moon and back' but right now it just comes out 'moon and back' which may be even cuter. When he gets in trouble he will come and give me a big kiss, thinking that kissing me will get him out of any trouble that may be coming his way. Sometimes he couldn't be more right. But when he does get put on those steps he serves his time with no complaints, he sits perfectly still on that bottom step. In fact he refuses to come off it. That is when we have the temper tantrums.

When you look at all of the good things that you have in your life you really do realise how much you have to live for. It makes you re-evaluate everything. I may not be where I had hoped to be career wise, own my own home or have the Mini Cooper that I have been dreaming of, but I do have a family. A little boy I couldn't be prouder of if I tried and the appreciation for all of those people in my life that make it extra special. I cannot even begin to fathom life without my cheeky toddler, not even if I tried.

I love not knowing exactly what is around the corner. 

We are armed with our blank canvas and rainbow paint, and we are riding the rollercoaster to wherever it may take us. 

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